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Today was not a great day.. Not even a good day..

But it started out good. Woke up before the boys to get ready.. got them ready and fed in time.. Even Sacrament was great. I thought I was in heaven with how well they were doing!! I was so thrilled..

But of course, as it always happens.. I thought all that fuzzy happiness too soon.

Then came Primary and since I was just called to be a Sunbeam teacher I was asked to sit and help with the kids.  Yep sure thing. I was happy to! I love the kids in Primary they are always so fun. But then cranky 13 month old Creighton started to not want to sit still. Cause THAT would be too easy for me.  And he's everywhere. And I'm sweating like crazy! (I do this gross sweating thing whenever I'm nervous and in an awkward situation) Then the other sunbeams were distracted by Creighton and how cute he is.. (which he is) THEN Cayden says to me "I can be here by myself mom" - like I was there to make sure he was okay with his class.. Sorry buddy I'm a teacher in here now... Then decides he doesn't want me at all..

*Insert full on tantrum that includes hitting mommy and crying*

Yep.. I was NOT happy about this. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to cry. Creighton was somewhere in the back knocking over chairs and Cayden was trying to push me out of my chair. Yayyyy.. This is the point where I just want to grab the cranky boys and leave.

Class wasn't better at all.. He saw his Sunny D bottle of apple juice and started freaking out wanting some.. Creighton went after all the Sunbeams.

Cayden also does this thing where he asks for the same thing over and over and over and over and over and over and over and OVERRRRRR until he gets it.. and if he doesn't he FREAKS OUT! Ahhh.. the life of a 3 yr old.. I thought I was lucky and had a kid that didn't throw tantrums... Today made me realize I am not that lucky mom who's kid is perfect..

So after crying my eyes out for a good thirty minutes when we got home, I finally was calm-ish to sort out my feelings and thoughts.

I'm still upset with the behavior of my 3 yr old who I was told is a perfect angel in Primary.  I think its a bad idea to have me in there. Let alone with his 13 month old brother. So when I'm a bit calmer and not about to burst into tears every 36 seconds.. (yep 36.. I've been keeping track. ha) I'm going to call the Primary President and explain how I feel about the situation.  If they would let me have Creighton in the Nursery earlier than 18 months and have me NOT in Cayden's class (there are 2 sunbeam classes) then I think things would be smoother.  I haven't been set apart yet because that was a whole other fiasco that I don't want to go into.  But I hate talking to people about my crap because I feel like I am being in the way or seeming not willing to accept callings.. I am very willing but if its going to be crazy like this every week.. my sanity canNOT handle that... I don't want to come home every Sunday and ball my eyes out and send Cayden right to nap time.. I can't..

Am I wrong in thinking this way? Should I just stick it out? I don't think I can.. I don't know..